 In so many ways the world is becoming a much smaller place with diverse cultures interacting nearly as much as people do who live side by side. Radio, television, and now the internet have all worked increasingly toward bringing people together, blending nations and people groups as never before. Some of the customs practiced by these disparate groups are also getting noticed, including the engagement habits of their peoples. In the US, it is customary for the man to get down on one knee to ask his beloved for her hand in marriage, presenting a diamond solitaire ring as a sign to her of his love and faithfulness. In some cases the woman will reciprocate by giving him a “promise ring” but this trend is still very uncommon. How will you propose marriage? Will you be upholding time-honored traditions or will you seek to blend in modern methods or even your own personal twist? For fun, let’s take a look at some of the engagement practices of people all across the world. When a man proposes to a woman in Spain, he does what many American men do: provide a pre-set diamond engagement ring to his heart throb. But, it doesn’t stop there: she’ll go out and find an engagement wristwatch and present that gift to him. In Japan, it used to be customary for a matchmaker to bring young Japanese couples together. Today, that has changed as young people are finding each other, getting engaged, and a pre-set ring is presented. However, it is still customary to have the families of the engaged couple get together to exchange nine gifts, including dried bonito and abalone, in witness of their engagement. The groom then presents a generous betrothal gift (averaging more than $7300) to the bride’s family. Brazilian couples will generally come together for a large engagement reception where the man gives to the woman a simple gold band which she wears on her right hand prior to marriage. During the wedding ceremony, the ring is moved to the left hand to signify that she is now married. Customs in Nigeria vary according to tribe and religion, but some of the common practices still in vogue today include a ceremony where the groom’s family introduces themselves to the bride’s family and asks for their daughter’s hand in marriage to their son. In time’s past, the couple would be married immediately after the engagement ceremony, but current Nigerian law requires that the couple register with the government before marrying. Couples in Egypt will exchange rings upon engagement and wear these same rings on their right hand until they are married, then move them to the left hand. During the engagement period, the man is responsible for securing a home – buying or renting a house or an apartment – and the home must include all the desired electrical appliances. Though the couple is the most important part of the marriage covenant, some of the behind-the-scenes folks also play significant roles. For example, in China, many families still rely on the services of a matchmaker who determines if the prospective bride and groom are compatible astrologically. Many Americans who are familiar with the story, “Fiddler on the Roof” gained a glimpse of Jewish customs, particularly for Jews in Tsarist Russia. During that time, the Father picked the groom based on the recommendation of the matchmaker, but as in the case of Teyve, father of five daughters, the three oldest made sure that they had their say too. Yes, the world may be changing and with these changes some customs are evolving as well. Though many young adults may want to do what is “new and different” many are honoring their families by honoring time-honored traditions. That pre-set diamond engagement ring can still be given, but as long as the remaining customs are upheld, then incorporating modern practices can still be enjoyed.
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